She is absolutely morally wrong. And you are definitely not an asshole.
Not much you can do to get them back from her though. But think about it this way, man.
You can always make more money. But your dignity is priceless. Don't even give her the satisfaction of speaking to you again.
I'd be willing to bet one of my kidneys that she'll try to reach out to you. Shameless users like this woman might pull the wool over one person's eyes, but somebody (probably this guy) will either see straight through her, or treat her like trash. Karma is an evil bitch and she's petty AF.
Hopefully, you'll be with a much nicer person that appreciates what you bring to the table, and not just money.
This sounds so exhausting. Are these “standards” really very, very important to you? More important than the person you love and are in a relationship with? More important than your connection, the fun you have together etc.? Then maybe you two aren't a good match, since he doesn't do the things you want him to do exactly the way you want them done by him. (No judgment here – that's your decision, obviously).
Does he do things to show you his love (not in your way, arts and crafts and gifts), but in his way? Is that a way you can appreciate and enjoy? Or does he always have to do the things you want him to do, when you want him to do them (- and those are not things he does on his own, which to me feels just not like an enjoyable way to exchange acts of kindness). A gift is a gift and not a coupon that has to be repayed in the same way by the recipient. It makes me kind of sad that receiving your gifts made him so sad, because he knows you better than we do, and he knew you didn't really give them as pure gifts (in the full sense, which is not expecting a very specific thing in exchange). If you are not okay with not being repayed immediately, I'd say maybe don't give that gift.
You have to decide how important your expectations/choreography for Valentine's day is to you. And if it is really, really important to you, than maybe you should find a better actor/partner for your choreography/plans. Because this guy doesn't follow your instructions word by word (…and therefore doesn't have what it takes to be your boyfriend).
Which to me personally makes this whole thing a bit pointless/confusing, because he doesn't genuinely do those things anyways. This way all you find out is whether or not he followed your instructions perfectly. That would not feel like a genuine thing to me at all. And therefore would not be relevant to me. I'd much prefer to find out how my specific partner shows their love, not how obedient they are while following my very specific instructions.
Again: really no judgment here – I just feel very different about these kind of rituals. Which absolutely does not mean your way of looking at it is wrong. It's just different to my perspective, and really confusing to me. 🙂
Get in writing first how he proposes to split the marital assets before you divorce. This could be done as a separation agreement prior to your divorce. Of course, consult your lawyer before you sign anything.
Broo… read this back to yourself. “… if she’d be willing be out in public with my eye looking like it does…”. Is she doing you a favor? She doesn’t have to post pictures of every single second of her life. She doesn’t even have to post pictures of you (black eye or not). The fact that this is even a question is appalling.
We both are weird, this is accurate 🙂 Different genders have different experiences around safety. He agreed to my point, I would defs agree if he made the point you suggested.
Remindme!
She is absolutely morally wrong. And you are definitely not an asshole.
Not much you can do to get them back from her though. But think about it this way, man.
You can always make more money. But your dignity is priceless. Don't even give her the satisfaction of speaking to you again.
I'd be willing to bet one of my kidneys that she'll try to reach out to you. Shameless users like this woman might pull the wool over one person's eyes, but somebody (probably this guy) will either see straight through her, or treat her like trash. Karma is an evil bitch and she's petty AF.
Hopefully, you'll be with a much nicer person that appreciates what you bring to the table, and not just money.
This sounds so exhausting. Are these “standards” really very, very important to you? More important than the person you love and are in a relationship with? More important than your connection, the fun you have together etc.? Then maybe you two aren't a good match, since he doesn't do the things you want him to do exactly the way you want them done by him. (No judgment here – that's your decision, obviously).
Does he do things to show you his love (not in your way, arts and crafts and gifts), but in his way? Is that a way you can appreciate and enjoy? Or does he always have to do the things you want him to do, when you want him to do them (- and those are not things he does on his own, which to me feels just not like an enjoyable way to exchange acts of kindness). A gift is a gift and not a coupon that has to be repayed in the same way by the recipient. It makes me kind of sad that receiving your gifts made him so sad, because he knows you better than we do, and he knew you didn't really give them as pure gifts (in the full sense, which is not expecting a very specific thing in exchange). If you are not okay with not being repayed immediately, I'd say maybe don't give that gift.
You have to decide how important your expectations/choreography for Valentine's day is to you. And if it is really, really important to you, than maybe you should find a better actor/partner for your choreography/plans. Because this guy doesn't follow your instructions word by word (…and therefore doesn't have what it takes to be your boyfriend).
Which to me personally makes this whole thing a bit pointless/confusing, because he doesn't genuinely do those things anyways. This way all you find out is whether or not he followed your instructions perfectly. That would not feel like a genuine thing to me at all. And therefore would not be relevant to me. I'd much prefer to find out how my specific partner shows their love, not how obedient they are while following my very specific instructions.
Again: really no judgment here – I just feel very different about these kind of rituals. Which absolutely does not mean your way of looking at it is wrong. It's just different to my perspective, and really confusing to me. 🙂
Get in writing first how he proposes to split the marital assets before you divorce. This could be done as a separation agreement prior to your divorce. Of course, consult your lawyer before you sign anything.
Broo… read this back to yourself. “… if she’d be willing be out in public with my eye looking like it does…”. Is she doing you a favor? She doesn’t have to post pictures of every single second of her life. She doesn’t even have to post pictures of you (black eye or not). The fact that this is even a question is appalling.
We both are weird, this is accurate 🙂 Different genders have different experiences around safety. He agreed to my point, I would defs agree if he made the point you suggested.