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Downvoted because she made a fake email to make the account with
I know hes had history of gfs cheating on him. Which i can definitely understand his apprehension. But he is the one most times that brings up things on his terms/his wants, like a house. Thank you so much for the advice, I appreciate it!
Sucks cause I really liked her for her personality but thanks for the advice
That's someone who, quite literally, is having his cake and eating it too.
Once he cheats, it's over. You can't go back to that and get any respect; especially from him.
There is no debate or arguing. Just leave. It is better to leave now than wait 10 years and be in the same spot, wondering why you didn't leave earlier in the relationship.
It's a very personal thing. If chastity is a major thing for you, a high body count just won't cut it. Different people have different priorities though. It happens all the time that two great people are anything but great together.
The pics on grave comment was a bit on the nose and obvious.
If it’s just because there’s no sex, yeah.
I can control my actions and i chose to ask her why he was touching her like that I didn’t know if i had done something wrong to make her mad at me and now she is with another guy but i had just had a complete miss understanding of the whole situation and i hate that i jump to the worst conclusion right away definitely something i need to work on not only in my relationships but in all aspects of my life
Proximity probably
Get some friends and family to help out and take out your role.
Why couldn’t you tell her that her leaving so quickly hurt your feelings? Why couldn’t you just tell her how you felt and what you were thinking?
i felt like I got played, that's why
by telling her i liked someone else i was hoping to get some sort of reaction to gauge her interest level. most girls would probably react.
I’m so sorry the excitement of this movie was ruined by this event.
For me, the hurt would be doubled because it happened during something that meant so much to me.
I’d be very cautious about him and his behaviour going forward and any more signs of anger or aggression would make me remove myself from the relationship until he did work on his anger in therapy.
People that I don’t talk to wished me happy birthday but my closest friend cannot do that? I’m a priority to an acquaintance but not to my friend? You lack tact.
You are overthinking it. He just found out you were married and congratulated you. Say thank you and put him on call block. I put past relationships with bad breakups on call block automatically. Do your family a favor say thank you and block his number. You are acting suspicious
Ahh, see even more reason for her not to do it.
If your girlfriend is being raped and molested by predators, she can’t really do anything to ‘stop this from happening’; these guys are the criminals who should be stopped.
Do you know your GF’s best friends? If so, get together and discuss a way to keep your GF safe. When going to these parties, maybe she could stay with people she trust and they could keep an eye on each other and keep each other safe.
Sometimes you need a nude break. It’s not kind, and it’s never going to be kind. It sounds like you were in an incredibly toxic situation and the ONLY way you were going to get out was a naked break. It’s not kind, but it’s life.
It’s been a year. You’ve grown, you’ve developed. It’s the point where you maybe feel more comfortable reminiscing about the good times.
You did a clean, very hot break for a reason. You don’t know if this person has grown or developed.
Don’t let them back in.
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Congratulations on the weight loss. Have you addressed the root cause of your food addiction with a therapist? Your husband is ass. I guess he forgot his vows.
You let a virtual stranger move into your home after a month. WTF?
Cripes, I wasn’t even exclusive with my partner til we dated 6 mos. Why did you move him in?
Plus he’s home all day with no job. He should be doing ALL of the chores. He contributes nothing financially.
You’ve found a hobosexual. Congrats. I’d get him out of your place ASAP and frankly, I’d just move on and date someone who isn’t a user and loser.
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It’s being mistaken. The effect might be the same—no day-of birthday celebration, but it’s an honest mistake and not an indication that the day wasn’t important to her.
People here are very reactive. You made a mistake. He made a very nice effort. You freaked at the price tag, probably bc you were thinking about all of the new baby expenses. I get it- I’ve been there. Still there. My kid is six and I just had to replace all of her clothes I just replaced last month bc she she had a growth spurt. One thing is. It connected to the other unless your husband couldn’t afford the gift, but it looks like he can. You need to apologize. Tell him you were overwhelmed with an expensive gift, your brain has been working overtime, thinking about all the baby expenses, and you were being stupid. You love the gift, it’s gorgeous and sentimental and he did great and you adore it. Baby brain took over, and your rational brain took back control, and you realized that you can’t sacrifice everything all the time until your child is an adult, especially such a thoughtful gift, and you are so sorry it hurt his feelings. You love having such a lovely reminder of the two important dates in your life, and will wear it all the time. Thank you. Then make him something he likes for dinner. That’s what I’d do, assuming that’s what the freak out was about. It IS a very thoughtful gift. He did very well.
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Thanks! Will look into there content
Thanks! Will look into there content
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r/antinatalism
Yes, I really wanted to fall for her in a romantic way but that's exactly how it feels. It feels like I'm hanging out with a best friend. I love her, but in a best friend way.
Your grandfather…?
She is trickle truthing… more happened. She is assuage her guilt
Does he have any kind of mental diagnosis? Maybe autism? My partner is autistic and there’s times where he has a huge issue with touching and being romantic. It overwhelms him. He makes a point though to let me know it’s him and he’s in his head and it’s not me.
We don’t have sex as much as I would like to and I know he has a porn addiction that caused some issues with him having ED. With that said he has been single most of his adult life so we had issues communicating for awhile. He’s cut down a lot on porn and masturbating to help with his sex drive and possible death grip issues.
At some point it came to a head because I was feeling rejected and gross. He was feeling guilty because he knows his flaws and how he can be socially unaware and in his head a lot.
I learned to be direct with him and not passive aggressive and let him know my needs and he lets me know when he’s overwhelmed or needs space.
Definitely marriage counseling.
Delete the message, put her in your rear-view mirror.
You are not with her, she isn't wanting to be with you. You are not wanting to be with her. She drunk dialed. Block the number, and your problem is solved.
When I was checking out artists for my one and only tattoo,I narrowed it down to 2 people and ended up choosing Gordon because,in order to prevent his work from being removed or covered, he doesn't take walk-ins and refuses to do names or portraits except in memorial.
Get a paternity test and either end the relationship or get counseling if you think you can forgive his mistrust and disrespect.
This sounds very much like my ex and his mother as well. Im so sorry to hear that yet ANOTHER woman is being vilified, because mommy’s precious baby boy doesn’t understand “no”.
Are you attached at the hip? Cause you don't have to go home with him, you can stay. He sounds like a homebody and there's nothing wrong with that. Or break up and date someone as extroverted as you. You're making this into an issue when it doesn't need to be.
Don't do the dumb overly happy passive aggressive bullshit responses, it's so easy to see right through it
I absolutely agree with everything you're saying, and have been saying it everywhere for the past few hours. If she doesn't try after we have a talk, then I'll have to break it off. My comment above is specifically for the few people who see this as 100% over and want me to tell them that I'm going to sink the relationship. When simply there's a big leak I've been enabling, and not asking the person with the tape to fix it. If she decides she doesn't want to take that time to fix it, then I'll abandon ship.
Your thoughts are in a mess and you don't know what to do with yourself.
You need clarity and closure.
For that, write out an email. Put your thoughts onto paper. This well help you work things out for yourself. This is a good thing to do to grab a grip on your mind, the organization and deep thinking will be beneficial for you.
After your letter is finished, you will feel better because you said what you needed to get off your chest.
Then you delete the letter for good. Do not send.
Any potential you two had for a reletionship clearly wasn't going to work. There were too many complications and roadblocks in your way. Its a nude truth, but that was the reality. That whole ordeal… is over and done with. It had to come to an end, so its good you got it. Do not reopen it.
All you need to do is worry about you. Her side is not important. You do not need to explain yourself to her. You just need to explain yourself to you.
⬆️⬆️⬆️????
Life hacks: skip coming-out conversations with a on-line demonstration?
I think the important part here is that you're hanging onto your sense of humour, and that this is on them, not you, for barging in unannounced. Guess they just got a reminder of why an emergency key is not meant to be an all-access pass to the house.
Similar situation man. Definitely take a step back and get your life in order first before thinking about her seriously.
Awww honey I'm so sorry! Girl go talk to him. Male him define “likes” and “attracted”. As in checking them out all the time? Fantasizing? Flirting? Just thinks they're pretty? And why tell you that? Does he consider how you feel before he says this stuff? Would he be hurt if you were into your male friends like that? Figure out exactly what he's thinking and proceed from there but be calm and solution oriented. If you feel at all that he doesnt really care how you feel or isn't going to respect boundaries, then you need to reconsider the relationship. Best of luck ?
I didn’t plan on changing him. I but when I found out he was prolife I thought he might think vegan was in line with his beliefs if I could just show him?
Everyone here has known me that long, I have watched baby's even grow to toddlers. Also why would he when he acts more like a child than even men my age?
lol
Don’t have sex with her ever again . You do not want to be tied to her .
Thoughts are just thoughts! Don't give them so much meaning / weight – try holding them lightly, with a sense of humor. Right now it sounds like you're trapped in a guilt/shame spiral about the thoughts – which makes them so much jucier for your brain to grab on to!
Which of these scenarios sounds more like your life?
Scenario A: You're with your boyfriend. A comparing thought pops up. You move on and turn your attention back to your boyfriend and enjoy your date.
Scenario B: You re with your boyfriend. A comparing thought pops up. You think “Oh no! THis again! Im such a bad person! I shouldnt have this thought! What does it mean that I keep thinking this. I should tell him. Should I tell him? He ll dump me. And on and on. Then later you keep thinking about that thought that you had. Why do you keep thinking it? When will it happen again? Why is it happening? And on and on.
I think you need to figure out how to shift from Scenario B to Scenario A. An idea on how to start – have a sense of humor about it, and just be curious. See how many times that type of thought comes up. When it comes up, say “Oh yes, there you are! – ONE”. The thoughts keep going. Say “Ah, even more thoughts about this! TWO.” Five minutes later “Oh my goodness thought you arebeing so persistent. THREE.”
Just keep it up, counting how many times a day this thought arises. BUT – have a sense of humor about it. Don't add to the thought – especially don't add self-judgement. Try that for a while and see what happens.
You were 18 and he was 37 when you got together? I can't even get past that part
Thank you!!
So, if you and he eventually on-line together, how many more cats will he insist you get rid of?
What else is he saying out of niceness that isn't true?
Dump the man, keep the cat, find a man who shares your values and interests.
If you're only 8 months in, and if your relationship is already stressful enough that you're taking breaks from each other, then just break up. You should still be in the honeymoon period of the relationship if you're not even a year in.
Whats the more likely scenario – that he's intentionally putting fingernail clippings in the cup to fuck with his wife. Or he just using a cup thats lying around to catch his clippings and a couple got stuck inside there and the nude liquid unstuck them and OP found them when drinking.
Seems like every post Ive seen recently is, My 18F boyfriend/Husband 62M is terrible what should I do?
I wish I was braless at 21. They are the most uncomfortable thing to wear. Tie an elastic around your balls then sticky tape them to your leg.
You concern is that the nipples are visible due to the clothing she wears. Buy her nipple covers and let her be braless.
Yeah your brother is trying to have a relationship with your now ex and is doing it behind his wife's back. You need to tell his wife what he has done.
I don't know if you'll be able to salvage the relationship with your ex, or if you'd even want to.
But you must tell his wife, especially as he has been spending a significant amount of money behind her back too. You could text her and frame it more along the lines that you are upset with brother because (insert reasons) but you don't want it impact the relationship between you too and you don't blame her at all.
We'll see. I've been single a couple of years and it's kind of addicting.
At the very least give SIL the ex's number, hopefully she will confirm the transaction with SIL
say nothing…really how can you respond to such stupidity…people just love the sound of there voice
So you miss a gold digging, cheating ex..? Why..
Awe,.that's sweet that your wife kept her name.
It also feeds the patriarchy machine when the woman is the only one expected to change her last name…and that’s just gross to me.
And that's the exact reason it bugs me so much lol
It’s not a joke if she put her real number down.
True & I’m not offended by that, it’s a fair comment.. We’ve spoken about it before a little and always come to the conclusion it’s worth fighting for and trying to improve, but I don’t see it getting better…
Please do leave. Get out and keep yourself safe. He is abusing you both sexually and financially. It could, and most likely would, escalate to physical as he seems pretty hostile and aggressive.
Also, not sure how far along you are or where you on-line, but you need to consider if you want to tie yourself to this man for the next 18rs. Not that you can’t keep the pregnancy, it’s your choice, just something to consider. You can do it on your own, should you choose to keep it. It’ll be worth your and your future childs safety and overall well being.
Stay safe.
Fishing is kinda specifically. I doubt he's hacked on that.
Your boyfriend's trust issues and overthinking behavior would be nude to handle, and it's important to communicate those feelings to him.
Start by acknowledging that you appreciate his concern and care, but that sometimes his overthinking can make you feel misunderstood and upset. Let him know that you understand why he may be feeling this way, but that it's important for both of you to be able to communicate honestly about your feelings.
Encourage him to seek help and support, and offer to be there for him throughout the process. Remember to approach the conversation with kindness and patience, and reassure him that you care about him and want to work together to overcome any obstacles in your relationship.
Just open a new account. Abracadabra, it all goes away.
He was spending 11 dollars per day on porn at that rate. He was definitely watching cams and tipping at that rate. I can't imagine how one could spend that much otherwise.
Are you going to listen to the advice given here that is pretty much unanimous or are you going to keep making excuses? You know what you need to do. So do it.
Dude. Leave. Why are you subjecting yourself to this abuse? More like he's making your depression worse.
And why are you afraid to tell the counselor the whole story? Let them do their job and don't do it for them lol, if your wife wants to tell them let her it's really stupid not to.
I know this is a bad defense but I definitely did not mean it when I said it to him. I found out he was trying to hook up with another younger girl on instagram, and he actively lied about it until I got definitive proof. I was drunk which doesn’t excuse it but I texted “go die” when angry about the situation. Absolutely does not make it okay at all. But later on he found out I lied about other stuff (granted it wasn’t me trying to hook up with anyone but I definitely was pathological in many ways) and he told me over multiple days that I should die in a gutter and that the world is better off without me.. and instead of saying sorry afterward he has told me he does mean harm on people who continually lie to him. I guess that maybe that is justified? I don’t feel the way about others but maybe since I lied as well it’s a normal reaction? I don’t know
you need to go out and socialize with normal people.
It’s always harder to end a relationship over incompatibilities. But that doesn’t make it the wrong decision. Let’s say you both made a list that included accomplishments and milestones you want to achieve over the next ten years, things you feel you need to have to be happy and words or phrases that describe your ideal life. When you compare lists, are they similar? More importantly, do they conflict? Are there things that are in direct enough opposition that someone would have to give up their desire entirely for the other to have theirs? If so, these aren’t just simple conflicts. They’re major, relationship-ending incompatibilities.
You guys got together during a time that you were and are both building out your identities. Those relationships are nude, especially when you love each other, but recognize you’re turning into two very different people. Instead of twisting yourselves into shapes that fit together, it might be time to let go, and allow each other to find partners whose “shape” matches. Which, btw, is also an act of love.
Yeah this sounds like what probably happened. Thank you
I think it’s less what you are fearing and more he is growing bitter seeing you become successful and take accountability in ways he never could. His life was picturesque (beneficial to him) one moment, and now that ease and “stay at home wife” stereotype he had of you has been shattered. I’d hazard a guess he’s just feeling inferior and instead of doing anything about it, he’s lashing out.
Has he always been like this or has this only started happening recently?
Whats wrong with the current house?
Oh wow! Yeah I think I’ll hint towards something next time we work together.
Don’t let her in the house with it. Make her leave it in her car or outside. “That is not coming in my house. I don’t want it. Please remove it”.
Let her get upset. She knows that your reluctance to upset her is keeping you from enforcing boundaries.
Just delete it. It’s not a big deal. Save it to your phone if it’s that meaningful to you eye roll
Yes, because all women want to go watch somebody play gold, or watch somebody hunt.
Look at OP's responses. What he wants to do is play video games, go golfing, or go hunting (and once he buys his first rifle, he's already told her she isn't allowed to use it).
If not those things, he wants to play video games, watch movies or TV.
She's not interested in sitting around on her ass.
Try laying on your back with butt at the edge of the bed, him standing on the floor. However, it sounds like positioning isn’t the problem.
Absolutely!!! I was surprised no one else mentioned it either. It's very very very alarming behavior and it will only get worse.
My ex would say absolutely horrific things to me, I would cry hysterically and beg for an apology or comfort, and he would actually FALL ASLEEP. He would just become an empty shell basically, give no acknowledgement, and fall asleep. It happened multiple times. The silent treatment was his favorite too. God, it was agony.
He actually chipped my tooth during an attack (I don't want to describe it but it was very obvious he caused it). The next day he asks how I could possibly know he was the one who caused it. A month later, I get another chip on my tooth (unrelated) and he says “I bet you're gonna say I did that one too.” He was seriously scary.
A few things stand out to me about your post:
He is responsible for waking up on time if he wants to follow through on plans. It's not your responsibility to wake up anyone but yourself. He's not your child.
Gas-lighting is when you are trying to undermine someone's sense of reality by denying it. Asking for specific instances of where you disrespected him is not gas-lighting. His calling it gas-lighting sure seems like DARVO though.
Asking for specific instances in order to understand and improve the relationship is actually a healthy response in a conflict. It's a bad sign that he reacted so aggressively to this request.
Your bf seems kinda emotionally unstable to be honest. It's nude to tell how badly from one instance but you are correct that this behaviour is showing some red flags.
I wouldn't want to date someone who behaved this way.
leaving is the best you can do for you and your daughter. I hope you have family or friends that can support you through this. make a plan, talk to a lawyer, and document as much as you can in case he tries to get vindictive about things. especially document the things he is doing that may be against the law.
we need to start normalizing walking away from relationships that cause more harm. you are not meant to be his therapist, his doormat, his maid, his sex toy. This isn't a partnership he is on a path of self destruction and at the moment he doesn't care who he brings down.
once you made up your mind to leave stay gone. He might try and convince you he will change and might even start going to therapy, don't let that fool you. He needs to get his crap together for himself and his daughter who needs a healthy father if he can't be a healthy father then he isn't entitled access to her.
good luck.
This person is not your friend; her repeated attempts to bring you down when others notice the results of the positive changes YOU have made in YOUR life is mean spirited and wrong. She had probably gotten used to feeling like the “superior” friend, or has narcissistic tendencies that make it nude for her to be happy for others she claims to care about. Either way, not good friend material.
I would probably just ghost her, since saying anything will probably be twisted around or turned into a major blowup. Just stop spending time with her and surround yourself with people who will cheer you on!
Some men just can’t finish unless it’s on their own. Focus on you both having fun and don’t stress about who cums when. It’s not a big deal.
Bruh get of Reddit and please please please seek help