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Wait…what? The immaculate conception does not refer to Mary's conception of Jesus without having sex?
Sorry if this is a dumb question, I've never really studied Christianity. I thought the immaculate conception was about Mary getting pregnant as a virgin.
100% is what it will take from both of us to make this the successful business we want it to be. She understands using a female pen name and her image is more viable for us, marketing-wise. So she has to know these books inside and out, has to display a high level of enthusiasm to customers (if you're blase about your book, what do you think customers will be?), and has to be 100% emotionally and mentally committed to this venture overall to push it to where it needs to be. That's why it is so important for us to be on the same page.
My girlfriend and I had a string of terrible luck on our second date, but to this day (4 yrs later) it's one of our favorite stories to tell. They were situations beyond our control, we were still having fun and that's what matters.
Thank you, I'll do that.
Yeah, not buying it, sorry mate. Your child wasn’t your priority, you did abandon him, and I think you’re at the very least twisting what the lawyer said.
Sounds to me like he’s showing you love how he would like to be shown. My husband is just like yours. He wants hugs and kisses, to be told I love him unprompted and he wants passion during sex. I, on the other hand, want to be shown love by him doing things to make my life easier that lets me know he pays attention to my daily needs/wants and is thinking of me (like him preparing my coffee in the morning is his equivalent to a hug)
Are you doing these things? Or as your post suggests are you only doing it prompted? As partners it’s our responsibly to get out of our comfort zone learn and know how our partner wants to be loved and do that for them. So if you’re never saying I love you on your own or just going and hugging him or initiating physical intimacy (no just sex as I do feel sex should never be done solely for the other person) then this is most likely your big issue. In the same breath if you’re trying to communicate to get straightforward answers and he refuses to discuss it’s either bc he’s said it a million times and is tired or he expects you to just read his mind. If it’s the latter that’s also not good. Counseling may help if you find communicating through issues is a problem.
I didn't give her any money.
Just curious: how has you (ex-)fiancé tried to make it up to you? What has he said he would to work work on his insecurities & jumping to conclusions? If he has not approached you with a short list of how he's going to improve, there's reason to be skeptical going forward. If all he has offered is to place the blame on you by 'not telling him your friend is Gay', then that's a red flag.
Honestly if the guy really has it that bad, therapy would have been better. I'm questioning the logic and conclusions you both came to, cause nothing makes sense and feels backwards.
If you can't sleep at night, just reach out. Been 8 months, are you waiting for a call you denied he could make or something? Get some closure or move on.
Geez respect.
1st bf and still with him after all this time?
I get it.
Good luck and hope all the best for you and your family.
Just know when and if you'll have to make the decision to leave though.
Why are you choosing and unreliable and unambiguous guy?
You sound really smart. You should totally write a book.
“ Sister made it clear that she didn’t want me to have a relationship with her baby so I am honoring that.”
You are allowed to say no and to walk away. Who can say why he wants one. Most likely he’s trying to see how far he can push you.
You don’t have to be the Cool Girl. There are plenty of men out there who won’t want to do this. Go find one of them.
Also, his comment about how he wouldn’t care if she was “unattractive” is a massive ?. People what to have sex with people the find attractive. He’s basically saying he just wants you to watch him stick it in a different hole. There is no respect here for you or the other woman.
What the hell is your husband doing about this?
Send her home. This is your house and your kids come above anyone, including your husband.
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That’s not your girlfriend. For all you know it’s not even a girl at all.
There is no way this is real
I agree, but some commutation up front would have salvaged the bruised ego lol.
So you can’t even sympathize with him? The father of your children? That’s very callous
You want the magic words or button that will stop his cute behavior? I guess only your husband can tell you that. And if you choose to not protect your son and leave your enabling lifelong harm. Not sure what you’re looking for here. My heart breaks for your son.
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How am I a douche bag? I’m just explaining what I meant
That's the struggle of dating someone with a ” Guy bestfriend ” . You dated her knowing that he will be in the picture as well. Nothing you can say or do honestly.
Does your bf play with the puppy, does the puppy sleep with A?
Right? Grown adults being messes is one thing but when they drag a bunch of kids into it ugh
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Don't move!
I mean, being a guy, knowing guys, AND having a daughter myself, I kinda get it, but…. It’s not your life to impose on, not to that degree.
I just hope everybody is nice and they all turn out okay.
You give great advice. It’s also going to depend on if they have any financial entanglements. Is there a lease he needs to be concerned about? Bank accounts? Credit cards? Cell phone plans?
If they are financially independent then that won’t factor in but if they are entangled he needs to weigh that as well.
It sounds like you just need to explain to Rosa all of your reasons and give her a vague timeline (to settle her concerns), then tell her that you would like it to be a surprise and that you don't want her to feel like she has pressured you into anything so to stop asking about it.
However, do you feel okay about the amount of pressure she's putting on you over this? Have you explained your position?
Don't propose during the trip. Let Mitch and Nora have their moment.
Nah I don’t need to get married but I know I’m in a very committed relationship. Don’t buy houses with people you’re not committed to – perhaps a better way to put it
You do have a problem, though. Don't gaslight your wife because you can't take a look at your own issues. Be a man and do something about it.
As a woman who would never share porn history with anybody even boyfriend, this can definitely be just fantasy that she never wants to try out in real life. Or maybe she’ll be interested by it at some point. The thing, it’s not because she consumes it a lot that she’s actually interested by the sexual practice of it. There’s probably a turn on that these videos have in common, submission, no control, stuff like this, but it doesn’t mean anything about her sex interests in real life.
If you want to know, you can ask. You don’t even have to mention the history you found. « Hey, if I want to try role playing or bondage in the bedroom, would you be down for it ? ». She’ll tell you.
Cancel the trip out of respect for your new BF. There is no way on this planet he won't be upset about this no matter what he says or what you think he will feel.
I had a trip planned with my ex that was going to be 100% platonic as we remained friends after the breakup but I still cancelled it as it would have been very rude to do the trip knowing she would have been upset about it.
Working with him is one thing, going on a trip is something entirely different.
I would say find a new bf, this one's broken.
Are you his wife or a mom? Let the guy enjoy his one night out without checking in every step. What's up with all the calls and text like he is a 16 yr old girl. You are so crazy you don't even realize your behavior is abnormal. Good grief!
He said he would be willing to try couples therapy, but he is not saying that doing that will change anything. He's promised he would try to go through therapy with an open mind. I do actually love him, I want to right my wrongs and keep progressing forward with healing. The idea of letting him go just destroys me.
Thank you! This is my thought as well. Until you change your perspective of “women” and learn to trust and tell the truth you have no business being in a relationship. You are setting yourself up for failure and hurting someone else in your wake. You will be hurt again, some women (people) can’t be trusted but you won’t have a meaningful relationship until you learn to.
As a side thought, in my younger days being with a virgin would be kind of fun and has appeal. 1) you know your compared to past partners 2) even minor experience will give confidence and sense of control over the experience and 3) it’s generally thought a positive aren’t sleeping around. Don’t sell yourself short because some immature women made you think less of yourself.
Very true. Thinking back the times I went for parties it was usually from older friends that have fallen out of the current friend group. People I still loved but potentially haven’t seen for a year or two. They are likely in that “zone” because they find interest in things I grew out of a bit. Ie strip clubs. At some point my current friends may have different vax and political views that widen and I end up hanging with the old topless bar friends. Who are now dads of little girls and no longer guy 🙂
Life and people are always evolving. Today is not tomorrow and certainly not next year!
INFO: Does he work, or use his depression as a factor for being a stay at home dad?
I would tell him that he needs to and take some time away from the household-hotel, motel, family or friends couches, but whatever it is he needs to be 100% away from the home and comfortablefamily life youve been providing and he's been taking for granted. Tell him to use that time to evaluate whether he wants to come back, but if he comes back, he is going to have to be an active partner instead of a 4th dependent. You can't keep doing this, and you're posting here because you know it. Putting a time limit on things, like “in two weeks you need to come back ready to be a partner, husband and father or ready to sign divorce papers.”
You've already been a supportive partner for years, but even though depression has been his excuse for interacting with you it simply cannot be a factor in his parenting of the kids- They're are just as much his children as yours, and if a person has kids they HAVE to step up and take care of them-his depression just doesn't matter when it comes to this.
So would you say I should check in with her again if she doesn't reply on her own at some point or not? From what she was telling me she is back at uni/work and also getting help, I just fear that she may feel so much time has passed she wouldn't be comfortable messaging me even if she wanted to I guess? Maybe that sounds stupid
I'm just feeling really confused because although she wasn't saying much, she still spoke to me a few times a week and she seemed to like it when I talked to her, but then randomly going missing for a month has me not knowing what to feel anymore, I can see she has been live! quite a few times at least so presumably she is ok at least
I guess I don't feel like I have amazing advice but I was definitely in your shoes. But the more you can communicate to him what's going on, the better. If on one of your good days you can tell him you struggle with this, then start trying to catch yourself acting on it. And try to be the first to apologize when you've done something to push him away. Just try and catch yourself doing it as much as possible and force yourself into the uncomfortable position of apologizing for it.
A good partner will be understanding of the trauma you've been through. So they should be able to take it when you push them away. It still can hurt though even when they know it isn't their fault, which is why it's important to keep communicating and apologizing.
Seriously, there is no such thing as over communication. It helps SO much.
Agreed. Also, don't be with someone who get mad you didn't respond to a text til later on in the day.
Should you continue? No
I would be open about how her comments have affected you and if you want to work through it insist on couples counseling at this point. On and off relationships are best left off in my experience. It sounds like she has had one foot out the door this whole time reconnecting.
Yeah that had crossed my mind as a solution, I was just wondering if anyone had some experience with this issue. Looks like that’s probably the first thing to try
There is no such thing as a slight addiction. My advice to you is consider how much you are willing to put up with, because he won't change, it will likely be a matter of time before he is cheating or entering high risk or illegal sexual situations.
Didn't even have the courtesy to tell him, he had to find out on his own? Cheaters are the worst kind of people, you don't deserve to be with anyone. If he was smart he'd have nothing to do with you.
We don’t know. Can you look through the texts between your boyfriend and his friend whose girlfriend it is?
That's really, really true. He's an awesome person, and I feel really awful for having this reactions. I now see the level of my misjudgment, thank you!
My ex. It took 5 months and for me to fall pregnant before he showed his true colours. This woman won’t mentally survive this relationship by the time that baby is 8 weeks old. I had the worst f*ing time of my life and he destroyed me whilst I was pregnant. Worst experience of my life. I’m glad I got out when I did (15months later) and I’m grateful every day he has nothing to do with his son UNLESS it’s a occasion that serves him a purpose where he can look like a doting “father”
lmao there has to be a better way than being like come get this hard stuff, very hot stuff.
Well, how about you talk to your partner and tell them how you feel and how you want to be viewed as more than a sexy piece of meat that needs to be pounded, covered in bread crumbs/rosemarry salt and then roasted in the oven at 425 for 25 min.
So basically you have no say on what you enjoy. It is his way or the highway. He is wrong and you are totally within your rights to decline anything you are not comfortable with. He is refusing to respect your boundaries and punishing you for it. Honestly don't see any way out of this other than calling it off.
That is not fair to him. I gave him the option of being monogamous with someone else, and he rejected it, to turn around and divorce him still after he was clear that he would rather be non-monogamous with me than monogamous with other people.
Yeah I’d imagine the thought of finishing quickly is definitely on his mind. Honestly I wouldn’t mind if he finished in 30, I’d be flattered lol.
Starting early is a good suggestion. Think I’ll make the move in the first 10 mins or so of the film. Will still go slow once I start but starting overall earlier should give time for that + some more later. Hopefully by the 2nd he won’t be so anxious.
That cat needs to go out more often
I don’t want to go though lawyers. Plus there’s kids involved I can’t just pack up and leave (especially since I’m my house).
This spring out from that he read through my fb-messages (I left my pc open) and found out that I met a guy for one date (for like an hour) when HE dumped me some years ago. And now almost everyday since he’s been interrogating me, even though I really honestly don’t even remember what the guy look like. So he says I cheated, but I don’t feel I did, after all we were broke up.
Buuut this is not the first time he’s acting like this, I should learn that it’s always gonna be something new. It’s just so hard when it’s your first relationship to know what’s normal and what I should tolerate. But this is simply causing me too much stress and work every day.
Yes I would say that counts. But either way, Jesus Christ there’s no way you’re “loose”. What an absurd thing for him to say. Chances are he’s experiencing decreased sensitivity from playing with himself all the time or he’s being a dick to distract from something else that’s going on, because now you’re worried about the state of your vagine.
Yes, even if it felt forceful (3 years relationship only 2 things)
But yes it felt forceful cause it was like i asked him to do so, he never took the chance to do it alone cause he wanted
But the idea of the post is about that specific day, valentine’s day
Honestly idc about valentine’s but it hurt me that he completely ignored me in that way, that’s Why i Made a post, cause it hurt his way of doing things, not that i wanted the flowers so bad
Time for him to return.
If he’s not ambitious enough to live! independently then he has to go back. You can’t charity date him.
This is a life experience for you to judge more carefully the people you date. Look for the signs.
I live! in an Asian country. We did have a few doctor visits together. The doctors we saw were also very kind to unmarried couples. Maybe just considering older and richer men. So that they can take care or would atleast encourage having a child.. or just some man with guts to take up challenges and life as they come and not always sticking up to the plan and make me do the same.
Have you asked her what she needs for this to be resolved?