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Ellie, 25 y.o.
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Iâm 10 years older than you and also dated a guy ~10 years older than me at your age. My advice? It sounds like youâre not ready to have a child, like your partner isnât going to commit to you (which is important to you, as it is to me, and thatâs absolutely reasonable). You deep down know what is best, so follow your gut on this one.
I know itâs clichĂ©, but Iâve changed SO much since I was your age. I built an amazing career, travelled the world, moved overseas and found a partner that is truly committed and we are excited for our future. Iâm so glad I didnât settle with the guy I met when I was 20, and if I had been in a similar position I would have done/felt the same.
At 20, the world is your oyster and you have so many lessons to learn, things to see and life to live!. Having a child is a life changing decision, and who you have a child with is the most important decision youâll probably make, so itâs one to really think through carefully.
Good luck!
It's not possible for you. But everybody feels the same way.
âThe child.â How sterile, thatâs your son weirdo.
If she is married and in the same time your GF, then its called adultery/cheating.
You are basically asking how a cheater can have a calm and non-problematic divorce without her husband getting angry.
Insane virtue signaling comment. Everyone knows this is a bad thing to do, settle down.
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Just echoing everyone's thoughts, but a burst appendix is a major deal. So major that many states/countries have laws stating that an inflamed appendix must be removed within 24 hours to prevent sepsis or death. Additionally, aftercare is really important because you need to keep the incision clean and take antibiotics.
That said, I started feeling bad on Father's day one year. It is supposed to be a day where you celebrate your child's parent. I told my husband that I needed to go to the hospital because something was wrong and he immediately jumped into action. He didn't think of himself or the ruined holiday at all. I'm eternally grateful to him because he saved my life that day. If I waited even a couple more hours, my appendix would have burst and I could have died.
Please put this experience into the perspective it deserves. If someone loves you, they will make taking care of you a priority. Your BF doesn't make your health a priority. He views it as an obstacle to him doing fun things. He is not a partner.
A lot of people might be uncomfortable and could express that calmly, but taking her phone and impersonating OP to decline the job offer is ridiculously controlling. Heâs not her parent and doesnât get to make unilateral decisions like that.
Your boyfriend is taking advantage of you. And oh boy is it working out for him. You are bending over backwards trying to meet and anticipate his every need while he what? Ignores you?
Why do you think this is the love you deserve? Thereâs a reason heâs not with someone around his age.
I wouldn't categorically say that she'll never see it. But it can take years. My own story is something I rarely share because of how messed up it sounds. I didn't know that me thinking it was consensual was because it was so much worse to think I had zero control.
I'll bet you're right about the cousin. It's really sad because often family will side with the abuser because it's simpler. It's heartbreaking.
Why don't you have sex for years? Do you not want to or something?
If it feels right In your heart, why not?
Not really, I said it is a concern, which it is.
I've been very careful to note it is possible to have a safe pregnancy far past 35, and the overall risk is low.
But it is a concern, and it's one men need to understand and plan for just as much as women.
We are real people. Iâm not a troll. Mocking this situation is not cool. I donât know who posted what yesterday since I donât follow this sub, but itâs interesting that you havenât considered the fact that on a sub with 8 million people that itâs not plausible for multiple people to have a similar situation.
Iâve blocked people on my phone (US) and if they call and leave a voicemail, itâll be saved in your phone under blocked calls or something at the bottom of your voicemail list. At least on iPhones.
“h made his choice”, you need to make YOUR choice. Choose yours and choose having your kids see you happy and healthy and in a good headspace.
your gf is a lunatic.
I'm up to dogs number 6,7 & 8. They all get flea preventative, and heartworm. Intestinal worming is combined with the heartworm.
They get vaccinated too.
They have all lived good long lives. My current oldie is 14 on Friday. My other is 13 and the young one is 7.
There is no reason a dog should have heartworm or fleas in 2023. There are plenty of SAFE and effective medicines.
Awww that sucks. I suffer migraines too. I hope you feel better soon. ?
You probably need to just send a message saying, âItâs pretty clear you either donât want or arenât ready for a relationship with me anymore, so I just wanted to make sure weâre both on the same page this is over and I wish you the best.â
You're not a child and he's not your parent. It's not his place to tell you you can't dye your hair or get more piercings. And it's a HUGE red flag that he thinks it is.
You can't “get” him to do anything but you can refuse to let him dictate your style choices. Emotional abusers are “very judgemental” of their partners and will make proclamations about what they can and can't do. Don't allow yourself to be disrespected in this way. Break up with him before he poisons you further.
You still donât trust her, so why are you with her?
She may have told you the truth already but youâre never going to let this go. And if she does admit to sex, do you really think youâll just accept it and move on?
Youâre on a slow and unswerving path to making both of your lives Hell. If you cannot forgive her betrayal and she hasnât been able to convince you to trust her, then reconciliation has failed and you should both move on.
You might want to read her previous posts. He did all this then snuck out with her multiple times to go swimming. He's cheated in most of his past relationships. OP has real reasons for her trust issues – she's in a toxic relationship with someone she can't trust.
OP Please leave him and get therapy.
Pretty brazen for her to do so knowing u could pop in any second
There is no problem with him being single at his age. There is a problem with him pursuing people 12 years younger than him at his age.
This is not a relationship advice question.
The trick shouldnât be âhidingâ that youâre needy and pretending to be all chill and independent when youâre not. Instead, itâs the harder thing: genuinely cultivating more independence and self-assurance by pursuing hobbies and interests, other social spheres and friendships, and possibly therapy or otherwise self-reflecting and working on anxious attachment.