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26 thoughts on “LeilaGemera live sex chats for YOU!”
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Abuse can happen at any age.
good luck
So, a guy with a girlfriend, has been keeping you on deck as a back-burner option since you were 17 even though he was 23. (From your other post about this exact thing)
Realize feelings aren't facts. Your feeling of being totally in love is actually a really normal human reflex when we are vulnerable. It's NOT a reliable sign this guy is WORTHY of your love.
You have only seen him in the context of him feeling like a place of safety and security. You haven't seen him as the boyfriend who keeps cultivating creepy relationships with kids under him.
Imagine being married with two kids, and find out from a friend that he is banging a waitress that used to be his student a year ago, and it's not the first time. OMFG.
When you feel attracted or day dream, stop and force yourself to think of a bad quality if his. You need to train your brain to recoil instead of lean in.
Raise the bar for what you find attractive. Listening and showing up periodically are bare minimum activities. Like every single, decent, guy should be able to accomplish that.
However, If the ONLY thing I knew about a 23 year old was that he spends a lot of lunches comforting a sad & lonely 17 year old girl?
Ew! WTF?! Thats gross to me, and I feel disgusted that HE is not taking steps to avoid an awkward, potentially abusive, & career ending situation.
Thats repulsive behavior in an authority figurer for EXACTLY the situation you are in now. You are convinced he is a good guy and you feel attracted to him BECAUSE HE allowed the boundaries to blur.
You need some distance to get some perspective. You need to look for another job. Do it now while you have the luxury of everything going smoothly. This is a situation where anyone would say “separate those two”.
Read Marriage Builders “The Love Bank”… it's meant for married couples that need to “get back the spark” but it can also be read to find hints for the opposite – you need to build distance in a too close relationship by purposefully STOP meeting each others needs for companionship and validation.
You are currently on a fast track to be “the other woman” to a CREEP, AND blow up your job with scandal. GET OUTA THERE!
Send him a clear message “Hey, I've realized that I'm getting too close for comfort in our friendship & for everyone's sake – I need to get some space to clear my head.
Sorry if it's awkward, but I wanted to say something so you know I'm not mad at you etc. But I think for now I need to stop having lunches with you, connecting outside of work, or having conversations about non-work related stuff.”
Take responsibility. Sit down and journal about what is the worst case scenario; you get even more deeply bonded to a quasi pedophile, he always keeps grooming teens, and you are stuck loving a guy who HURTS people. Obviously he has a lot of work to do so he can learn how to respect and maintain appropriate work boundaries…
Now is the time for YOU to catch and reject your urge to latch onto a random nearby jerk who ignores boundaries – and rewrite your standards so that you don't perceived violation as passion.
With him operating a forklift, I assume it's some sort of a warehouse job. I would imagine this time of year (the holidays), there is potentially extra work to do. My husband works in construction and the summer time is their busy time of year. It's not unheard of for him to work 60 to 80+ hours per week during that time.
Do you have some other reason to doubt and not trust him? Is there something else he is doing or saying to make you feel this way? Or is this coming more from your own insecurities and past experiences?
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I have lost all interest in self-expression. Every passion I've once had has become meaningless. That is another reason I posted this. I have been further and further disengaging with everything that makes life meaningful. Without intervention, I will eventually reach a point where I will be compelled to let go of life completely.
I have let her know that my isolation has nothing to do with her and that I greatly value her. She knows I have problems. However, I know she feels pain that I have not been able to overcome them. It hurts being unable to establish a bond I yearn for so greatly.
You're right about needing more understanding. I have a lot to learn and work through so I can make sense of the way my brain works.
Yes, that’s true, not about winning any argument, thank you I forget this.
Yeah but why has this suddenly come on in the last 4 months and now before they started dating? That's a huuuuge change.
Left me ex for this. Took years to realize it’s not a shallow thing to do. Not being attracted will take a toll on your physical aspect of the relationship and eventually will fade. Don’t beat yourself up, someone else will see everything you saw in them plus they will find them attractive in their own ways and love them just as much as you did, if not more. Isnt that the silver lining here? Just because you can’t, doesn’t mean someone else can’t
yes, will definitely be more prepared and strategic next time.
I guess you should get the burka back out of the closet?
I’m not sure why they felt the need to tell you there was something for you you’ll never get. Why couldn’t they keep that to themselves?
Very least, it's emotional cheating.
I'm guessing people saying it is ok has never been in love before. Google stated it well “As painful as physical affairs may be, they don't require deep romantic feelings. Emotional affairs, however, can feel far more personal because they imply that your S.O. liked someone else because they were more exciting to be around than you.”
I'm sorry man, it really sucks and hurts. You seem to be handling it well or at the very least, not so furiously angry you're ranting.
Appropriate response? Depends, you want to repair the rift? Couples counselling. It'll be a long process, but I've seen married couples come back together after quite a lot. No excuse on her part, but it sounds like she's at the very least ashamed and wants to resolve the issue.
If you're simply finished, separation is always a consideration. I warn you, in the eyes of the courts, emotional cheating does not constitute adultery.
I said “start with” for a reason.
You cannot parent her, it is not your role.
If your sister trusts you and listens to you and confides in you, it may be possible to talk with her and discuss what is happening to her but this has to be on her terms, she is an adult.
If you feel your relationship is comfortable enough you could send her flowers.
This way you can include a little note to say you hope she feels better and just as something to cheer her up. They will be a lovely reminder that you are thinking of her every time she looks at them.
Absolutely, I am kind of like that. I am probably going to say no, but I still want to be invited! I know that is kind of flaky, so I am very open about it and honest and my friends accept me as I am because that’s what real friends do. I think OPs friend is being super shitty.
That’s heavily cultural
Alright!
Life is too short to date losers. Cooking is easy.
I don’t eat meat. He does. So I end up cooking dishes that can accommodate both of our dietary needs
I mean, that makes no sense.
YW! Good luck! ?
You need to tell Kate what is going on. Lucy may not like it but what you are doing is very unfair to Kate.
It is ok to distance yourself because of Lucy, but its horrible to let Kate think it is because of her.
The right answer is for Lucy to get therapy for her insecurities.
You’re the villain in someone else’s story just as much as you think this guy might be. I find those types of groups and forums to be utterly loaded with toxic fucking people.
I divorced my ex wife because while she was in residency she took up and hid a gnarly pill addiction and eventually cheated on me with a preceptor…. I promise you her story of how our relationship ended is quite different. Imagine if she were the type to post on a forum like that.
Neither of you have any clue about anything with raising kids 🙂
Nobody does, until they do.
You’re still young, people learn and they mellow.
Please stop projecting your relationship on a SINGLE INCIDENT. Christ people on the Internet deserve to be alone, I'm reminded daily.
Don't you think that you deserve a lot better than this woman? Better end it now before this destroys you.