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u/FakeCartWheel, it looks like you're trying to post a throwaway submission. Your account is too young and/or your comment karma is too low.
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In short you would be implying they were not protecting you as they should have (true) but nobody wants to face up to their failures. Find an impartial ear to help yourself heal. It won't be your parents. Keep the love and don't attempt the “sister” discussion. There is no upside.
Was thinking the same thing tbh, I grew up in the good ol christian conservative home and was sheltered so well that a bit younger I would have asked this kind of question and actually meant itching, to this day I haven’t been able to figure out real masturbating so yeah it’s possible
The fact she got upset tho, is the one slightly telling thing, who knows though
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Not odd, she wants to be included in your life.
Idk man, reading this subreddit that sounds like a gold mine compared to what people settle for on here.
You or me or your sister could drop dead tomorrow
Accidents happen. Illnesses and disease happen. Regrettably, things like murder happen. OP's correct in “how long will he live” but is ignoring the fact that sister could be wiped from the face of the planet, as is life, and dad not once thought about that and try to reconcile. He chose to stomp his feet like a child until sister had something shiny and new he wants to play with.
This is the one I thought.
Not sure what you are on about mate but im not a woman.
We are talking but I’ve talked about a lot of stuff with the first guy, we’ve connected over childhood stuff and talked for hours every night and really opened up. He’s been helping me strive to be better and I’ve been using a lot of my therapy lessons in this “relationship”
Great! That sounds promising.
These things happen. Its okay to let people down. Its a risk we all take when it comes to dating. We make ourselves vulnerable for a shot of love. Being let down is a part of the process.
What's the alternative? You keep the connection ongoing when you're not really into it? Does that sound fair to him? Building up false hope the longer it goes? That is how people become even more hurt.
It's better to let someone down earlier than later.
And you said that you want to do things right with the other… putting an end to the other would be the right thing to do for everyone involved.
& OPs bf handled it much better than I would have. As soon as someone starts throwing around pedophile accusations I'd encourage anyone to get out of that situation immediately. If that's me I'm going home and dumping OP the next morning, blocking her and her family on everything and never speaking to them again, accusations like that even though they're utterly ridiculous can destroy a person's life. OP you need to never take your poor boyfriend around these pieces of shit again, but given how poorly you handled the evening and just left your bf fighting for his life in every interaction I suspect nothing will change.
Can all of your guys be the daddy? Like be in there for the kids life together? Or is someone against that?
I agree. She claims they were together for six months, prior to his passing, yet she didn't know he passed 8 months ago? Either he dumped her before he passed, or they were super, super casual as in he saw her once in a blue moon.
oh definitely i agree it should be. this is also why i don't have any guy friends because i just don't trust men to begin with. it's a dangerous world out there
Your GF has no moral compass when it comes to marriage and relationships. You appear to be working under the assumption that what's in the past is in the past, but at the same time you are saying she was getting turned on telling you about it. This is her kink. And it will always be her kink. You are the “Nice Guy” that she's really not into but she's comfortable with. She 100 percent masturbates about it and probably fantasizes about him when you have sex with her.
Ask yourself, why is she so boring with me, but wasn't for him? The reality is that she's just not that into you. You're just the safe guy.
Sounds almost like a mental break?
Why did you lie about being 21?
He's seducing you. Back away now if you really don't want to ruin your existing relationship.
Thank you for sharing this. Your husbands behavior is awful: there’s no doubt about that. So often we read these stories and the abuse is so clear it’s dumbfounding why the person stays.
But you shared your husband’s good qualities as well. That is poignant and powerful.
You still may have to leave him. I think you have to be willing to leave him to have any chance of actually staying together. He has to know that things can change or they can end but there’s no going back.
I hope you can find a great solo therapist. I hope you can find a good marriage counselor. I hope he can find the moral courage to recognize the biases and fears that are leading him to try and reduce your joy and agency. Sadly, it can be hot to grow on the same schedule. But that’s marriage.
There’s a book called Crucial Conversations that I loved. I don’t think it will help you find the magic words to save your marriage. But it may give you some insights into what happens when people clash, and it may help you know that you did your best.
Good luck. I am sorry. Stay strong.
This seems like a tough situation. To grab the bull by the horns: you are in debt, losing money and still not covering half of the expenses with your boyfriend, though you've agreed to split them. His financial situation is not as dire, but he still doesn't feel comfortable enough to lend you any (more?) money.
So: you need to do something to earn more money, right? Even something that gave you an extra hundred dollars a week would make a big difference in your life. You seem like you are expecting that the right words will get your boyfriend to cover for you financially, but he really may not do that and your relationship could suffer for that (and moreover that would place you in a worse financial situation, it seems).
I suggest looking for an easy, hourly remote job. Good luck.
Sorry online, but this one is abusive too. He just doesn't hit you.
No, I mean what you have isn't a friendship because it is based on a lie. She doesn't know that you aren't her friend and likely will be upset/put off when she inevitably learns the truth. Your relationship is inherently selfish and deceptive. So tell her the truth if she really is your friend and you care about her more than yourself.
Just sit her down and tell her you “know” and you want to her to leave immediately. If she’s looking into room sharing, it doesn’t sound like she’s taking much but offer to let her take any of the furnishings she wants, then change the locks. Give a key to a trusted family member or friend and have them supervise the removal of her belongings. Let her know that anything remaining is subject to being thrown out.
You might also want to let her know, you have no intention of hiding the reason she is leaving and she missed her chance at staying friends by cheating. Don’t let her control the narrative.