Sure, friends would be 'nice' but after years, literally, of him making it pretty clear that wasn't the intent you really should have found it a lot easier to put up that stop sign. Maybe you were naive, maybe you idealised the dynamic in a different way, but all the same you have your own roll in this.
It's not addiction to “drink twice a month.” It is addiction to BINGE drink twice a month and need it to get over yoru anxiety and “have fun.”
Sure, friends would be 'nice' but after years, literally, of him making it pretty clear that wasn't the intent you really should have found it a lot easier to put up that stop sign. Maybe you were naive, maybe you idealised the dynamic in a different way, but all the same you have your own roll in this.