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You're not being selfish.
Your MIL & FIL have no right to badmouth you behind your back, and you shouldn't expect to have to put up with that from them. Tell your wife it's not YOU depriving them of their relationship with your child, it's their behavior about your race and how they might treat your child and what sort of racist behavior they might enact around her.
If they're racist around your child, they lose the right to be around the child. I personally think a child would have their growth stunted a lot less by having two grandparents who love them, instead of two loving and two who keep calling the child “Mommy's little N-word mistake” or whatever vile crap they'd probably spew.
This is something to put your foot down. It's not selfish to demand basic respect from your in-laws.